Turns out I got a little too excited too soon about the decrease in my nausea. This morning is brutal. I woke up trying very hard not to gag at the slightest little thing...dishes in the sink, making coffee (decaf), making oatmeal (very bad choice when your already nauseous by the way...), trying to figure out what I'm gonna have for lunch, taking out the garbage, etc... Even sitting here now recalling the situation has started that familiar and uncomfortable feeling in the back of my throat. (open and insert one raspberry preggy pop!). Okay, I'm going to move on to another topic now.
Seems that these pregnancy hormones have done quite a number on me. I really thought I was doing okay in the mood category...I've never been one to blame my actions on PMS or any other hormonal instability...but this is really just CRAZY. Sometimes I feel like a totally different person. For starters...I have never been terribly emotional. Sad movies and stories often make me tear up a little, but I'm generally really good at keeping my composure. Well, forget that now. Tears are rolling far more frequently than I am used to and it has kinda thrown me off a little. I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. One thing is for sure...I am going to have to quit watching Emergency Vets and Baby Story...sure waterworks, every time!
Not only that...but I seem to be having trouble keeping my conversations rational. I mean, I can start out talking about a very good topic...something that needs to be discussed...something that could be resolved calmly and orderly...and by the end of the conversation I am a hopeless mess and I've managed to blow the situation completely out of proportion and made matters about 1000 times worse. I have always had an incredible knack for being over analytical and talking things to DEATH...combine that with these pregnancy hormones and...watch out. My intentions are good...I just want whatever to be resolved so we can move on and live in harmony...but once I get started there is NO resolution or harmony anywhere to be found. Who IS this person?
And talk about over sensitive! I'm constantly making the wrong conclusions or assumptions about other peoples actions. Things that would normally just roll off my back can now become major issues in my mind. I'm a paranoid mess.
Unfortunately, Mike is really the main one getting the brunt of ALL this. Sometimes I think if we manage to get through this without him leaving me, THAT will be the true miracle of pregnancy and childbirth. Pray for him...pray for US. Pray for anyone who comes across my path. Lord help us all.
1 comment:
We tried to teach a pregnant friend how to play euchre once. We blamed her mistakes on the baby sucking all her brain power. You are not alone, Nancy J.
Love,
cheryl
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