I had my first appointment yesterday and for the most part it was very helpful and informative. We talked about my appointment schedule, what to expect, what is "normal", she gave me TONS of reading material and some free samples. She also did an exam and another ultrasound (I got to see the heart beat again...very, very, cool). Before I went off to the vampires to give half of my blood away (okay it was only 3 tubes...but it was not the most exciting part of my visit)...she talked with me about certain genetic tests that are available to me.
Mike and I decided early on that we probably wouldn't bother with the genetic testing because we don't have any intention of ending a pregnancy regardless of what we find out in any test. Problem is, my uncle was Down Syndrome and my brother is Autistic...huge RED flags in the medical community. My doctor said that she had to strongly recommend not only the genetic testing but an amniocentesis as well! Now, I love my doctor...don't think for a minute that she is the one I am feeling "pressure" from...not at all. She made it VERY clear that I can decline any and ALL of these tests and it would be perfectly fine. She just has to recommend them based on my family history.
So, it's not that I want to change our decision. I honestly don't think I want these tests, but the problem is...there is so much pressure out there to "do the right thing" not for us, but for the baby. So much of what I am reading is really making me feel irresponsible for even considering not having these tests. The main consensus (in these articles at least) seems to be that even if I wouldn't terminate a pregnancy, it is only in the babies best interest for me to know what I am facing and have the best care lined up if I should find that something could be wrong.
The key word there...something "could" be wrong. Most of these tests are not diagnostic...they just give you a better idea of what my "risks" are for certain disorders. Then based on these tests, they recommend more tests usually more invasive and tests that have their own risks involved. So, is this information I really need to know? Am I really starting out as a bad mother if I choose not to have these tests? Is knowing this information really going to be what it best for my child?
My gut feeling is as it has been all along. God is in control. No amount of testing or preparation is going to change his plan for this child. How much of this is really going to benefit us and how much of it is there just to offer us another way of trying to have our "control" over the situation? I am 99.9% sure we will decline this testing, but I just wanted to share my thoughts with you...and hear some of yours. Obviously we want to do what is best for our child. Please pray that God will give us wisdom and peace about this decision and many more to come!
2 comments:
I think you're on the right track. As you have said, God has been in control of your reproductive lives up to this point. He certainly has a plan for your family that is unfolding day by day. Continue to pray as you have been and let your Father guide you.
Miss your blogs....
KK
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